Kakashi and Zabuza's Odd Adventure
by happychica
Summary: Warning: Check label before consuming. Not for headaches.


Disclaimer: We don't own anything!!!...except some cosplay stuff.

A/N: Apology fic for THR.

Warnings: Drunkenness, but due to that, ya can't really say if it's OOC or not, can you…

Narration  
"Talking"  
_Thinking  
_**Actions  
**(Author comments)

(Here we go...)

_Ah, my head feels like its being kicked by one ticked off horse._ Hatake Kakashi looked around the wooden house that Tazuna, the bridge builder, had called home for many years. He had gone off to work on the bridge, with Sakura tagging along to 'guard' him. Naruto and Sasuke had gone off to the woods to train some more. Tazuna's daughter and grandson were off in the town, trying to find food that would work for dinner that night. Four extra people to feed was starting to take a toll on their food supplies.

Standing slowly, the copy nin made his way to the kitchen. _I think this is where she said the headache medicine was,_ thought Kakashi. Everything seemed a bit hazy, what with the chakra depletion and the pounding headache. Crossing the room, Kakashi opened a cabinet and peered inside. There were several plain white bottles, each identical to the one next to it. _Well, whatever she gave me was liquid, so anything solid won't work_. Reaching into the cabinet, Kakashi pulled out one of the bottles and sniffed it gingerly. _Well, it smells as bad as the stuff she was giving me. Guess this must be it. Wonder why she has so many bottles of the same stuff._ Quietly, the copy nin up ended the bottle and drained it quickly. He promptly chocked on the substance.

"No…no, I don't think that was right," he coughed. He tried another bottle, with the same results. After emptying the cabinet, Kakashi came to the conclusion that the poor women was out of headache material, and that the bathroom needed to be closer to the kitchen. _Of all the times to need to go_.

Once Mother Nature's call had been answered, Kakashi set off to find his bed. As all the world had gone fuzzy, he wasn't sure which room it was, so he picked a door and went through. And fell off the porch.

"Ow."

Getting up, Kakashi stumbled off down the dirt path and ended up in a clearing in the woods. _This looks like where the kids were training. Maybe I can get them to get me some headache medicine. And cause some trouble._ Kakashi giggled madly before trotting into a tree.

"Stupid path, moving around so I can't find it." Turing slightly, Kakashi felt his way to where there were no more trees and tried again. This time he fell over a log. "Dang it!"

A little way off, Zabuza had been exercising his leg muscles. Accurate as Haku was, that stupid trick still had side effects. The infamous nin paused at the first exclamation, then went in search of the cause of the ruckus when the noise persisted. His search lead him to a very drunk copy nin, who was currently beating the heck out of a tree he seemed convinced was Tazuna.

"And that is for this dumb mission, you stupid git!" Zabuza stared at the strange sight for a few moments before sitting down. _He's gone mad_, thought the nin, _stark raving mad._

"Um, Kakashi?" The copy nin turned to locate the source of the new noise. "Do you need some help?"

"Nope, I'm ok!" A blurred looking cow stood and walked over to him.

"I doubt that. You're hitting a tree."

"No I'm not!"

"Yeah, you are. Look." Kakashi turned his head to see that, indeed, it was a tree.

"Oh. Well, that would explain why it didn't hit back." The demon nin hit his head sadly at his opponents state.

"Come on, I'll take you home. Where are you staying?" Kakashi opened his mouth (or so we think), then paused.

"Wait a minute, you're the bad guy. I can't tell you where I'm staying! You'd kill us all!"

_I would, if it weren't for these damn injuries! _Zabuza thought bitterly. "No I wouldn't."

"Yes you would!" Kakashi said, pointing at Zabuza. "Cause you're the bad guy, and bad guy's always try to kill the good guys with lame plans that never work! I know, cause I'm smart like that! I KNOW ALL! I KNOW ALL! I KNOW-"

"Oh for the love of God, would you stop already!" Zabuza shouted. _What the hell is he on?_

"No! I know all! I know-" Just then, Kakashi fell over, asleep.

Zabuza stared at the drunken ninja for a couple of seconds. Then, Zabuza crossed the clearing to where Kakashi was sleeping.

"Get up, you asstard, I know you're faking." Zabuza said irritably, nudging Kakashi with his sandaled foot.

"Go away…stupid cow…zzz" Kakashi turned over, still asleep.

Zabuza sweat dropped. _He really has lost it. Oh well. _Zabuza then took out a kunai. _I should just end his misery here, while I have the chance. High or not, I can't risk keeping him alive…_

Zabuza slowly brought the kunai next to Kakashi's throat. He was about to cut it when Kakashi jumped up, kicking him where the sun don't shine.

"AHA! STUPID BAD COW! I WIN!" Kakashi smiled and jumped in the air. (Wow, he can move for a crippled guy.) "MAD COW CONQUERS ALL!" With that, the drunken nin sped off towards his bed, now miraculously knowing its exact location.

Zabuza squinted after him. _When I can stand, he is going down, damn it._

"Zabuza-sama! Zabuza-sama! Where are you?" _Uh-oh, Haku can NOT see me like this. What to do, what to do, what to do-_

"I'm busy!"

"Doing what, Zabuza-sama?"

_Uh, uh, uh, _"Having tea with Kakashi!" Silence greeted this little proclamation. Then an ear-piercing scream. _Perhaps that was not the best way to sooth him_.

"Zabuza-sama, I shall save you!" _Oh dear…_

A truly exhausted Zabuza. Haku had taken it upon himself to 'de-girliafy' his master by having him do 'man's work' all day. _How the hell am I to finish my job when I just finished the damn bridge!_ Later that night, Zabuza snuck out and undid all his work, much to everyone's annoyance, including his. Haku had been cranky about his diassapearance.

"You had me worried sick! Goodness, don't ever do that again! You know, you're just like-" _Here we go again…_

Meanwhile, Team Seven was trying desperately to wake their sensei.

"Ok, we've tried water, heat, pillows, food, and Sasuke's shoes (which nearly killed most of the occupants in the Land of the Waves) Now what should we do?"

"I vote poking."

"Poking isn't going to work."

"Yes it is."

"No."

"Yes"

"No."

"Yes"

"Ok, I'll prove it to you that poking won't work!"

Sasuke reached over and gently poked their sensei.

**Bang. Smash. Scream. WOOT!**

"HIYA! TAKE THAT, STUPID COW WITH DUCKASS HAIR"

"SASUKE?! ARE YOU OK?!"

"Tell my fangirls…I love them."

"Sasuke's scarred for life again. Where'd you put the Teletubbies DVD?"

"Is that really necessary?"

"Yes Sakura, it is." Naruto quietly popped in a Teletubbies tape and both genin ran form the room. Shutting the door, they listened to the sounds emanating through the thin wood. Then a horrible thing happened. _Both_ their sensei and Sasuke began singing along to the tape. Loudly. And severely off-key. Naruto and Sakura, fainted.

"Oh, so that's where all my sake went. Stupid kids, they should know they're too young." Tsking loudly, the bridge builder dragged the unconscious children to their rooms, purposely ignoring the screeching coming from the other guest room. _I really don't want to know…_

fin

A/N: Yeah...O.o


End file.
